Dr. Robert Chase Quotes

Okay, what disease can turn Cuddy's mother into a coma patient named Stewart?

I'm pretty sure my X-Ray machine can take your phone in a fight. It'll fry it.

What about boogers? Should we include boogers?

Dr. Robert Chase: Just tell me the truth.
Dr. Allison Cameron: About what?
Dr. Robert Chase: Did you ever love me?
Dr. Allison Cameron: I don't know!
Dr. Robert Chase: Thank you for finally telling me.

When two people have had sex, unless it sucks, if they can do it again, they're gonna do it again.

Tom: You married?
Dr. Robert Chase: I - I was.
Tom: Did you ever agree to go see a chick flick with your wife, or pretend to enjoy classical music?
Dr. Robert Chase: Stravinskey never groped my wife in a midtown hotel room.
Tom: She needs this, I don't. I don't want her to feel bad about that.

Martha Masters: There has to be some kind of inciting psychological incident.
Dr. Robert Chase: This is perfect for you. You get all the human interaction you crave without any actual human interaction.
Martha Masters: She was a cheerleader. Hah.
Dr. Robert Chase: You know, when you're interested in something and nobody else is, the polite thing is to keep it to yourself.
Martha Masters: Popular, beautiful, gregarious.
Dr. Robert Chase: Hydrogen sulphide is about two parts per billion, the the size of healthy fart. I'll be back for you in July.

Wynn: When we were talking you seemed like a nice guy. So either you're a great actor or you're a nice guy who lost his way. For whatever reason, a little negative re-enforcement seemed warranted... Oh currently your password is "Great big ho." Change it back to anything but "password."
Dr. Robert Chase: Hey, I'm - I'm sorry. Let me prove it to you by taking you out for dinner followed by not sleeping.
Dr. Robert Chase: I'm serious.
Wynn: Not on your life.

Dr. Robert Chase: You think Taub really comes across as the most trustworthy doctor here?
Dr. Eric Foreman: I knew it was bugging you.
Dr. Robert Chase: They cut me out.
Dr. Eric Foreman: You're a pretty boy. Works well with the ladies, not so much with the patients. No one wants an underwear model performing their splenectomy.
Dr. Robert Chase: I notice they weren't exactly knocking down your door looking for Dr. Trustworthy.
Dr. Eric Foreman: That's 'cause I'm black. Cortisol levels look normal. We were wrong. Which House will interpret as him being right. He's gonna make us biopsy the pituitary gland.
Dr. Robert Chase: You seem pretty calm for a guy who's surrounded by racists.
Dr. Eric Foreman: 80% of the Princeton population is white. Some are racist, some aren't. White works with both demographics.
Dr. Robert Chase: So race is your excuse, not the fact that you usually look like you're about to punch someone in the face?
Dr. Eric Foreman: We're good.

Dr. Robert Chase: She was nervous. Give her a break. Oh, and she's not like Cameron.
Dr. Gregory House: True. Cameron had much smaller breasts, by which I mean she was smarter.

Dr. Robert Chase: Good morning gentlemen.
Dr. Robert Chase: Well, if it's any consolation, I didn't get any sleep either.

Just like most straight marriages. He's got the right to life liberty and unhappiness - like the rest of us.

Dr. Robert Chase: Just because he has guns doesn't mean he's a murderer.
Dr. Remy 'Thirteen' Hadley: Tell that to the bear.

Dr. Robert Chase: You really don't think you're a knight, do you?
William: Being a knight isn't a game. It's a lifestyle. And we do it everyday. Not just when we play dress up. We live by a code and uphold ideals like: loyalty, courage, humility.
Dr. Chris Taub: And the part where you beat the crap out of each other in armor?
William: That we do for fun. At least it was, until yesterday.

Dr. Robert Chase: We could do a full body scan.
Dr. Gregory House: We hate full body scan.
Dr. Eric Foreman: And by "we" you mean you. We also hate it when patients die before we figure out what's wrong with them.
Dr. Gregory House: ...Do the scan.

It was his thumb. I couldn't just let him toss it in the trash to save a few bucks.

Dr. Robert Chase: In the lab, there is significantly less chance of getting killed. You're too close. Slow down.
Thirteen - Dr. Hadley: We're in a car in broad daylight. What's going to happen?
Dr. Robert Chase: You honestly think he doesn't have a gun in that car?
Thirteen - Dr. Hadley: You think he's going to shoot doctors?
Dr. Robert Chase: Just... back off.

Dr. Gregory House: Why are you doing surgery when I need you find me a new case?
Dr. Robert Chase: You don't want a new case.
Dr. Gregory House: Oh, right.

Dr. Eric Foreman: Maybe this is House's way of telling you to talk to her.
Dr. Robert Chase: Sure. How was your day, honey? By the way, I killed someone.

Whether you want to be in charge or not, you *are*. And you always will be.

Martha Masters: He already jumped off a hotel balcony. Who knows what he'll do next.
Dr. Robert Chase: [Noticing House pass by the office] Ride some kind of... prostitute chariot to work.

Dr. Robert Chase: Cameron is not going to be happy about this party.
Dr. Gregory House: But you on the other hand...
Dr. Robert Chase: Plan on spending the rest of my life with Cameron.
Dr. Gregory House: So... I need the cancel the Fart Band?
Dr. Robert Chase: So I need you to kidnap me.
Dr. Gregory House: Spoken like a true Aussie.

Dr. Robert Chase: Have you talked to anyone about it?
Dr. Remy 'Thirteen' Hadley: No, I may have an Aortic Arch Aneurism. Oh wait, that's her. Either help me or leave!

Dr. Jessica Adams: I know when House went to prison you quit medicine. You don't do that unless...
Dr. Robert Chase: I didn't quit. I took a vacation. I knew when he got out, I'd get my job back.
Dr. Jessica Adams: House didn't even know he'd be coming back.
Dr. Robert Chase: I had faith.
Dr. Jessica Adams: Now that has baggage stamped all over it.

You know how I got interested in medicine? When my mother drank, she couldn't handle me, so she locked me in my father's study. Only so many hours you can cry and bang the door before you give up and try and find something to read. We all have family disfunction. Tha

Dr. Robert Chase: He's not in prison; It's kinda hard to gas a guy unless you can seal him in a room first.
Dr. Gregory House: Which is why Arceus created the universe with three states of matter, and three hundred solid and liquid poisons that could cause these symptoms.
Dr. Chris Taub: Arceus?
Dr. Gregory House: Look it up.

Dr. Jessica Adams: Do you think people can change?
Dr. Robert Chase: No. But I don't think that's gonna change your opinion, because... people don't change.

Dr. Walter Cofield: Were you angry with Dr. House?
Dr. Robert Chase: It was a prank. It wasn't uncommon.
Dr. Walter Cofield: So I've heard. That doesn't mean you couldn't get angry. Might actually contribute to that reaction.
Dr. Robert Chase: May I ask why that matters? Are you trying to prove that I was distracted, that my judgment was compromised?
Dr. Walter Cofield: Who do you think was at fault for what happened to you, Dr. Chase?
Dr. Robert Chase: Again, why does it matter?
Dr. Walter Cofield: You're a smart doctor. You know what happened here better than anyone, and you've worked with Dr. House longer than anyone and I suspect that you've spent every minute since this has happened trying to answer that very question.
Dr. Robert Chase: I don't think it was anyone's fault. I was angry, but I wasn't distracted. And I think that, if there's any chance I'm gonna walk again, it's because Dr. House is a genius.

Dr. Eric Foreman: You don't have to work for House, but you do owe me twenty clinic hours.
Dr. Robert Chase: What? Getting knife doesn't buy me an extension?
Dr. Eric Foreman: Buys you whatever you need, but I know you. If all you do is physical therapy and your nighttime version of it, you'll loose your mind faster than your regain of your fine motor skills.

Dr. Robert Chase: Really? George Washingbaum?
Dr. Chris Taub: He was a character in the Flintsteins.

Dr. Jessica Adams: We see people with disabilities all the time, but seeing and understanding are not the same.
Dr. Robert Chase: Are you talking to me, or writing a Facebook post?

Dr. Jessica Adams: I'm not saying he is definitely sick. I'm just saying we should look into it.
Dr. Robert Chase: No, we shouldn't. If you believes House is sick, it's only because that's wants you to believe.

Dr. Gregory House: Roomies with benefits keeping you up?
Dr. Robert Chase: Cribbage. I played with Park's Popo.
Dr. Gregory House: Is that two separate events?

Dr. Robert Chase: See tomorrow.
Dr. Jessica Adams: Do you... going get a drink?
Dr. Robert Chase: To annoy Park or to prove House is wrong?

Dr. Eric Foreman: She knows more about her daughter's genetic condition than any of you. She'll be an asset.
Dr. Robert Chase: Or she won't, Eric.
Dr. Eric Foreman: This isn't a request. Use her.

Dr. Jessica Adams: Anyone studying A-T would be researching it.
Dr. Robert Chase: How? Do you see any lab rats down here? The only cage I saw is right there.

Dr. Robert Chase: If she's never kissed a boy, it's a fair bet she's never had sex.
Dr. Gregory House: Tell that to all the hookers who won't kiss me on the mouth.

Dr. Robert Chase: Yeah, maybe Chase screwed up.
Dr. Robert Chase: You always end there, just getting a jump on it.

Dr. Gregory House: How much morphine is the husband on?
Dr. Robert Chase: We can't increase it anymore. His respirations are depressed.
Dr. Gregory House: Decrease it! Drugs cloud people's judgment. Cold turkey the sucker.

Dr. Robert Chase: What are you looking for?
Dr. Gregory House: I called my mom. She didn't pick up.

Dr. Robert Chase: You want to give Foreman a brain biopsy?
Dr. Gregory House: C'mon, really, who doesn't?

Dr. Robert Chase: This kid is not Esther. You screwed up, she died. I'm sorry, but that does not mean this kid is dying as well.
Dr. Gregory House: Geez. You get testy when you don't get any fuzz.

Dr. Gregory House: She's got post traumatic stress disorder.
Dr. Robert Chase: We got models fighting in Iraq now?

Dr. Robert Chase: The only thing you've been asked to do is supervise House in case he does something insane.
Dr. Allison Cameron: Which might, you know, save a life.

Dr. Allison Cameron: You're not curious?
Dr. Robert Chase: I'm curious about crocs, but I don't stick my head in their mouths.

Dr. Robert Chase: Happy Valentine's Day.
Dr. Allison Cameron: A holiday that only applies to people who are already paired up. For everyone else, it's Wednesday.
Dr. Robert Chase: Wow. Thank you for that dash of cold water.

Dr. Gregory House: Do the things, the, you know, blah blah blah blah blah, all that stuff the other docs did. If that's negative, ultrasound his belly. If that's negative, CT his abdomen and pelvis, with and without contrast. Did I miss anything?
Dr. Robert Chase: Kitchen Sink?

House isn't going to hand you anything. You want him, you've gotta take him. Jump him.

Wow! Yeah, I get it. House is adorable. I just want to hold him and never let go.

House never gives speeches!

Dr. Allison Cameron: Everything in society tells us we have to be thin to be successful.
Dr. Robert Chase: No, society tells you you have to be thin to be attractive. And guess what, that's what attractive means: that society likes looking at you.
Dr. Allison Cameron: I think we should be telling our kids it's fine as long as they're healthy.
Dr. Robert Chase: All right. You weigh 90 pounds because it makes you healthier?
Dr. Eric Foreman: Forget it. He's just cranky because he's the one who's going to get the axe.

Dr. James Wilson: The only question is whether she dies in two months or three.
Dr. Eric Foreman: Oh, God!
Dr. James Wilson: You were right. There's nothing we can do for her here. Might as well put her back on the street.
Dr. Gregory House: Unless it's not cancer.
Dr. Robert Chase: Oh, you're joking?
Dr. Gregory House: Well, hard not to. There's nothing funnier than cancer.

Dr. Eric Foreman: You make enough calls, one of 'em is bound to be right.
Dr. Robert Chase: Yeah, he's just a lucky, lucky guy.

Dr. Robert Chase: Your choice is to send bands of drunk crazed children to massacre an entire people?
Dibala: Don't ask me questions you don't want to know the answers to.
Dr. Robert Chase: I saved your life. I deserve to know what you're planning to...
Dibala: Whatever it takes to protect my country!

Dr. Eric Foreman: This is definitely different.
Dr. Robert Chase: It looks almost like...
Dr. Cameron: He's caring.

Dr. Eric Foreman: So, the sleep lab. You and Cameron not sleeping. How serious is it?
Dr. Robert Chase: It's nothing. She's only doing it to make House jealous.
Dr. Eric Foreman: Then why are you doing it?
Dr. Robert Chase: You kidding?

Dr. Allison Cameron: Bacterial infection is more likely to turn constrictive. It could be TB.
Dr. Robert Chase: Right. Forgot about the part where she did time in Russian gulag.

Dr. Robert Chase: You're trying to make me jealous.
Dr. Allison Cameron: Yeah, I want you to profess your love for me. Oh wait, you already did that and it caused me to end our relationship.

Dr. Robert Chase: Your head still hurt?
Nate: Are you a moron?

Dr. Robert Chase: That's funny.
Dr. Allison Cameron: It's not funny. It's totally immature.
Dr. Robert Chase: It is funny. You just can't appreciate it because you're the victim.
Dr. Allison Cameron: Yeah, I deserve shame and ridicule for offering a consult. Unheard of for a doctor.
Dr. Robert Chase: You didn't offer a medical consult. You offered a "Dealing with Foreman" consult.
Dr. Allison Cameron: For the good of the patient. It's what House would have done.
Dr. Robert Chase: Maybe House will hear about it and tear up with pride.
Dr. Allison Cameron: You think I'm trying to impress him.
Dr. Robert Chase: I think that for someone who's not involved in his team, you're remarkably involved in his team. Let it go. Let him go.

Dr. Robert Chase: You want more time? Joshua got God to make the sun stand still. No reason God can't speed it up. And, by God, I of course mean you.
Dr. Gregory House: I told you we needed you.

Dr. Robert Chase: Why do you need me?
Dr. Gregory House: Saying "nice work, Chase" when you're not here is pointless.

You want me to do a second major surgery on a patient we almost lost during a first major surgery to see if she needs a third major surgery?

Dr. Robert Chase: This is pathetic. If I strap a bomb to my chest, do I get seven doctors attending to me?
Dr. Gregory House: Dr. Robert Chase. On the off-chance you have some brilliant escape plan and are the vengeful type.
Dr. Robert Chase: Do you think he's the only guy in New Jersey with an unsolved illness and a pistol? I'm not playing this game.

Dr. Eric Foreman: Her trial results are already compromised just from the fact that I know. As long as she's wasting her time, why not give her something that might actually help her?
Dr. Robert Chase: Valid point. Except for the fact that it's a load of crap. Don't be an idiot.

Dr. Robert Chase: Office romances are a bad idea.
Dr. Robert Chase: We beat some very long odds.
Dr. Allison Cameron: Wow. I mean, save the gushy stuff for the wedding.

Dr. Chris Taub: Kutner wanted to die, Charlotte doesn't. So in a contest for my concern and interest, she wins.
Dr. Robert Chase: Okay. Either you're a cold-hearted bastard or you're too miserable to face it. Go home and cry.

Dr. Eric Foreman: He's really talking to a patient?
Dr. Robert Chase: I don't know who I am anymore.

Dr. Robert Chase: You don't have doubts. You just don't want to kill the only thing left of someone you loved.
Dr. Robert Chase: Don't do it.
Dr. Allison Cameron: I do have trouble giving things up. For example Dr. Allison Cameron: I never cancelled any of our wedding plans.