House M.D. quotes

James: You can't go in there.
Dr. Gregory House: Who are you and why are you wearing a tie?
James: I'm Dr. Cuddy's new assistant. Can I tell her what it's regarding?
Dr. Gregory House: Yes. I would like to know why she gets a secretary and I don't.
James: I'm her assistant, not her secretary. I graduated from Rutgers.
Dr. Gregory House: Hmm. I didn't know they had a secretarial school. Well I hope you took some classes in sexual harassment law. Does the word 'ka-ching' mean anything to you? I'm going in now.

James, Dr. Gregory House

Screw you. I'm sick of making excuses for you. I'm sick of other people having to tip toe around you and make their own lives worse while they try to keep you from collapsing. I'm done!

Dr. Lisa Cuddy

You find the toxins, you run your bubble study. You won't find anything, but I'll get the office to myself. There's a lot of porn piling up on the internet. Doesn't download itself.

Dr. Gregory House