House M.D. quotes

Dr. Wilson: Billionaires buy movie studios to get laid. They buy hospitals to get respect.
Dr. Gregory House: And the reason you want respect?
Dr. Wilson: To... get laid.

Dr. James Wilson, Dr. Gregory House

Dr. Eric Foreman: A Scare test is insane.
Dr. Taub: Scare test is legitimate. Simulates real world conditions. This fling with Cuddy is insane. Flare gun? Scary enough?
Dr. Eric Foreman: How about just telling her we're planning this stupid test? And I'm hoping House and Cuddy are more than just a fling. It's clearly mellowed him out. He didn't even care about Thirteen.
Dr. Taub: Right, the guy who ordered us to stop the patient's heart has mellowed out. It's gonna be horrible because it's doomed. Which is just gonna make House 50 times more of a crank. Firecrackers! We can hide 'em under one of those covered food trays.

Dr. Eric Foreman, Dr. Chris Taub

Martha M. Masters? I'm Doctor House. This is the rest of the team: Boring, Bimbo and Bite-Size. Martha enjoys quadratic equations, Italian frescoes, and her turn-ons include learning to be a doctor.

Dr. Gregory House