The Mentalist quotes

It's lovely to meet you doc, you're a horse's ass, but you mean well. I'll be in van.

Patrick Jane

Patrick Jane: Didn't Rick Tiegler's black-out strike you as weird?
Wayne Rigsby: Why? He got drunk, he blacked out, he killed someone. Who hasn't been there?
Wayne Rigsby: ... Kidding.

Wayne Rigsby, Patrick Jane

Oliver: How did he die?
Patrick Jane: Gunshot wound, which, uh, suggests it wasn't the quantum lords that killed him.
Oliver: Duh. They'd use a lorax beam.

Patrick Jane