Dan Humphrey: I'm saving you.Serena van der Woodsen: [upset] I don't need to be saved.Dan Humphrey: Really? 'Cause I could see your eyes rolling to the back of your head from across the room.
Vanessa Abrams: So this Blair girl used you as her slave?Jenny Humphrey: No, I was her handmaiden.Vanessa Abrams: "Handmaiden" is Jane Austen for "slave."
Serena van der Woodsen: What the hell are you doing here?Blair Waldorf: Uh... Looking for you!Georgina Sparks: To observe and record.Nate Archibald: No, we're here to help you.Chuck Bass: And get you home.Dan Humphrey: And, uh, I don't even know what I'm doing here.
Serena van der Woodsen: I can't believe you told her.Nate Archibald: You just expected me to keep it a secret?Serena van der Woodsen: Yes, Nate! There's nothing wrong with keeping a secret if the truth is gonna hurt someone.Nate Archibald: That's a hell of a way to look at things.Serena van der Woodsen: Oh, I'm sorry I didn't realize all of a sudden you're the most honest guy on the planet.