My 5th job was a garbage collector. I cleaned up after litter bugs and didn't have to talk to anybody. Sometimes I liked to pretend I was an intergalactic robot.
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My third job was for a company that printed logos on novelty items. I worked at the frisbee-printing machine. A frisbee is a circular plastic disc that people throw at each other, that is like a boomerang but it does not come back.
Unfortunately, in America, babies are not found in cola cans. I asked my mother when I was four, and she said they came from eggs laid by rabbis. If you aren't Jewish, they're laid by Catholic nuns. If you're an atheist, they're laid by dirty, lonely prostitutes.
You are my best friend. You are my only friend.
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