It would be good if there was a Fat Fairy. She would be a bit like the Tooth Fairy but would suck out your fat.
Read more Max Jerry Horovitz QuotesFrom: Mary and Max
Unfortunately, in America, babies are not found in cola cans. I asked my mother when I was four, and she said they came from eggs laid by rabbis. If you aren't Jewish, they're laid by Catholic nuns. If you're an atheist, they're laid by dirty, lonely prostitutes.
I was born Jewish and used to believe in God but I've since read many books that have proven God is just a figment of my imagination. People like to believe in God 'cause it answers difficult questions, like where did the universe came from, do worms go to heaven and why do old ladies have blue hair. And even though I'm an atheist, I still wear my yarmulke as it keeps my brain warm.
When I was young, I invented an invisible friend called Mr Ravioli. My psychiatrist says I don't need him anymore, so he just sits in the corner and reads.