It would be good if there was a Fat Fairy. She would be a bit like the Tooth Fairy but would suck out your fat.
Read more Max Jerry Horovitz QuotesFrom: Mary and Max
I have also invented some new words. "Confuzzled", which is being confused and puzzled at the same time, "snirt", which is a cross between snow and dirt, and "smushables", which are squashed groceries you find at the bottom of the bag. I have sent a letter to the Oxford Dictionary people asking them to include my words but I have not heard back.
Unfortunately, in America, babies are not found in cola cans. I asked my mother when I was four, and she said they came from eggs laid by rabbis. If you aren't Jewish, they're laid by Catholic nuns. If you're an atheist, they're laid by dirty, lonely prostitutes.
Not much has happened since I last wrote except for my manslaughter charges, lotto win, and Ivy's death.
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