The Mentalist quotes

Teresa Lisbon: Your file says that you finished college at 16, graduate school at 19. You were sent here after nearly choking your father to death.
Oliver: He's not my father. He's a cyber clone sent by the galactic quantum lords.
Patrick Jane: Oh, them. You know, they're always up to something shady.

Teresa Lisbon, Patrick Jane

Jupiter: It's the biggest day of their lives, don't you get that?
Teresa Lisbon: Barney Sloop had his head bashed in, Mr. Gallegos. Big day for him too.

Teresa Lisbon

Teresa Lisbon: Play nice, Van Pelt's entitled to her opinion.
Patrick Jane: Not if it's wrong. This is like believing in the Easter Bunny.
Wayne Rigsby: Who said there's no Easter Bunny?

Wayne Rigsby, Patrick Jane