Deadpool : You know what we need to do? We need to build a fucking team. We need 'em tough, morally flexible, and young enough so they can carry this franchise 10-12 years.Dopinder : My body is an instrument of death.Deadpool : Not now, Dopinder.
Wade Wilson : Sorry I'm late. There was a bunch of handicapable children stuck in a tree and I had to, uh...Vanessa : Uh-uh.Wade Wilson : You're right. I was fighting a caped badass. But then we discovered his mom is named Martha, too.Vanessa : No.Wade Wilson : You got me. I was rounding up all the gluten in the world and launching it into space where it can't not hurt us ever again.Vanessa : Try again.Wade Wilson : Diarrhea? We can't be sure until I get this suit off but, uh, all signs point to yes. Traffic? Hmm?Vanessa : Kiss me like you miss me, Red.
You're not a fuckin' hero. You're just an annoying clown dressed up as a sex toy.
Dopinder : I want to fill my soul. I want to belong to something, like you, Pool sir.Deadpool : Dopinder, you never cease to surprise me. You know, the depth of your heart is extraordinary. We all need a sense of belonging. We all need a genuine sense of home, a place...Dopinder : I want to become a contract killer.Deadpool : I'm sorry, what did you say?Dopinder : Remember when I kidnapped Bandhu and threatened him with great violence?Deadpool : Yeah, you kinda killed him.Dopinder : And remember the movie "Interview with the Vampire?"Deadpool : Don't want to.Dopinder : When Tom Cruise fed 10-year-old Kirsten Dunst blood for the first time. And she looked up at his smooth, handsome face and said "I want some more." Oh, Pool, picture me, a 10-year-old Kirsten Dunst.Deadpool : ...I'll never not picture that. But I can't wait to never speak of this, as soon as possible.