Father Janovich: What can I do for you Walt?Walt Kowalski: I'm here for confession.Father Janovich: Holy Jesus, what did you do?
Thao Vang Lor: You should quit. Those things are bad for you.Walt Kowalski: Yeah? So's being in a gang.
Walt Kowalski: Now you just gotta learn how guys talk. You just listen to the way Martin and I banter it back and forth. You OK? You're ready?Thao Vang Lor: Sir!Walt Kowalski: Alright let's go in...Barber Martin: Perfect! A Polak and AND a Chink!Walt Kowalski: How ya doing Martin, you crazy Italian prick?Barber Martin: Walts! You cheap bastard! I should have known you'd come in, I was having such a pleasant day!Walt Kowalski: What'd you do? You ruse some poor blind guy out of his money? Gave him the wrong change?Barber Martin: Who's the Nip?Walt Kowalski: Ohh... He's a pussy kid from next door. I'm trying to man him up a little bit... You see kid, now that's how guys talk to one another.Thao Vang Lor: They do?Barber Martin: What, you got shit on your ribs?Walt Kowalski: Now you go out and come back in and talk to him like a man, like a REAL man. Come on! Get your ass outta here! Come on back now.Walt Kowalski: Sorry about this.Thao Vang Lor: What's up ya old Italian prick?Barber Martin: [pointing rifle at Thao] Get out of my shop before I blow your head off, you goddamn dick sucker! Go!Walt Kowalski: Jezus Christ, Holy Shit! Hehe. Take it easy, take it easy!Walt Kowalski: What the hell are you doing? Have you lost your mind?Thao Vang Lor: But that's what you said. That's what you said men say.Walt Kowalski: You don't just come in and insult the man in his own shop! You just don't do that. What happens if you meet some stranger? You get the wrong one, he's gonna blow your gook head right off!Thao Vang Lor: What should I have said then?Barber Martin: Well... why don't you start with... eeehm... Hi or Hello...Walt Kowalski: Yeah, just come in and say... eeeehm... Sir, I'd like a haircut if you have the time.Barber Martin: Yeah, be polite, but don't kiss ass.Walt Kowalski: In fact you could talk about a construction job you just came from and bitch about your girlfriend and your car.Barber Martin: eeeehm... Son of a bitch, I just got my brakes fixed and eeehmm those son of bitches really nailed me, I mean they screwed me right in the ass!Walt Kowalski: Yeah, don't swear AT the guy, just talk about people who are not in the room... eeeh... you could talk about your boss... eeeh... making you work extra time when there is bowling night.Barber Martin: Right, or... eeeh... my old lady bitches for two goddamn hours about how... eeeeh... they don't take expired coupons at the grocery stores. And the minute I turn on the fucking game, she starts crying how we never talk!
What the hell does everybody want with my Gran Torino?
