Aw, I have three kids and no money. Why can't I have no kids and three money?
Read more Homer Simpson QuotesFrom: The Simpsons
Carol Berrera: I have been looking at your file, and I'm worried that you're falling behind the other students.Bart Simpson: I'm troubled, Ma'am. I need a firm but pretty hand.Carol Berrera: Would you like to have Martin Prince tutor you?Bart Simpson: No! Last time he went to my house, he talked about bird watching all day. Even my mom got sick of it, and she loves boredom.
Homer Simpson: He, he! You're fat!Patty Bouvier: You're even fatter.Homer Simpson: Damn straight! No one outfats me!
Homer: Little Lisa, Lisa Simpson. You know, I always felt you were the best thing my name ever got attached to. Ever since the time you learned to pin your own diapers, you've been smarter than me.Lisa: Oh, Dad...Homer: No, no, let me finish. I just want you to know I've always been proud of you. You're my greatest accomplishment, and you did it all yourself. You taught me to understand my own life better, and made me a better person, but you're still my daughter, and I don't think anyone has ever had a better daughter than...Lisa: Dad, you're babbling.Homer: See? You're still helping me.