Homer: We're proud of you, boy.Bart: Thanks, Dad. A part of this D-minus belongs to God.
Homer Simpson: Here I have all this money, and I can't even use it to help the woman who gave birth to me.Barney Gumble: Why don't you buy stuff for your family and leave it where they can find it?Homer Simpson: That's brilliant! Just for that, you can help yourself to anything from this tree.Barney Gumble: But that's not the money tree.Homer Simpson: This is the tree where I hide my adult magazines.Barney Gumble: Whoa!
Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, contrary to what you have just seen, war is neither glamorous nor fun. There are no winners, only losers. There are no good wars, with the following exceptions: The American Revolution, World War II, and The Star Wars Trilogy. If you'd like to learn more about war, there's lots of books in your local library, many of them with cool gory pictures. See you next week. Peace, man!
The way I see it, if you raise three children who can knock out and hog-tie a perfect stranger, you must be doing something right.