The Dude Quotes

Let me explain something to you. Um, I am not "Mr. Lebowski". You're Mr. Lebowski. I'm the Dude. So that's what you call me. You know, that or, uh, His Dudeness, or uh, Duder, or El Duderino if you're not into the whole brevity thing.

Ow! Fucking fascist!

Mind if I do a J?

I was one of the original authors of the Port Huron Declaration. Not the compromised second draft...

He was innocent, not a charge was true, and they say he ran away... Branded!

The Dude abides.

Who the fuck are the Knutsens?

Far out, man. Far fucking out!

This is a very complicated case, Maude. A lot of ins, a lot of outs. Fortunately, I'm adhering to a pretty strict drug regimen to keep my mind limber.

So if you could just write me my check for ten percent of a half a million... five grand... I'll go out and mingle.

The Dude: Your money is being held by a kid named Larry Sellers. Real fucking brat, but I'm sure your goons can get it off him. I mean, he's fifteen.
The Dude: Flunking social studies.

Oh no, really, it's, ahh, not even... not even bruised anymore.

Who the fuck is Arthur Digby Sellers?

What the fuck are you talking about?

Oh boy. How ya gonna keep 'em down on the farm once they've seen Karl Hungus.

That rug really tied the room together.

They're gonna kill that poor woman.

He just wanted the car. All the Dude ever wanted was his rug back. That really tied the room together.

I'm sorry your stepmother is a nympho.

My only hope is that the big Lebowski kills me before the Germans can cut my dick off.

At least I'm housebroken.

Where's the fucking money Lebowski?

I could be just sitting at home with pee stains on my rug.

Hey, nice marmot!

H-hey, this is a private residence, man!

Yes, Walter, you're right. There is an unspoken message here. It's "FUCK YOU, LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE!" Yeah, I'll be at practice.

I hate the fuckin' Eagles man.

Of course the car made it home, you're calling me at home. No, Walter, it did NOT look like Larry was about to crack!

This is a very complicated case, Maude. You know, a lotta ins, a lotta outs, a lotta what-have-yous. And, uh, a lotta strands to keep in my head, man. Lotta strands in old Duder's head.

Mr. Treehorn treats objects like women, man.

God damn you Walter! You fuckin' asshole! Everything's a fuckin' travesty with you, man! And what was all that shit about Vietnam? What the FUCK, has anything got to do with Vietnam? What the fuck are you talking about?

Hey, careful, man, there's a beverage here!

Walter, I love you, but sooner or later, you're going to have to face the fact you're a goddamn moron.