Honey, I'm so proud of you. I watched you very closely, and you didn't screw up once!
Read more Carolyn Burnham QuotesFrom: American Beauty
Welcome to America's weirdest home videos.
It's a great thing when you realize you still have the ability to surprise yourself.
Well you know what? I've changed! And the new me whacks off when he feels horny!
Read more Carolyn Burnham Quotes