Sir Bedevere: What makes you think she's a witch?Peasant 3: Well, she turned me into a newt!Sir Bedevere: A newt?Peasant 3: I got better.Crowd: Burn her anyway!
Read more Tim the Enchanter QuotesFrom: Monty Python and the Holy Grail
Black Knight: All right, we'll call it a draw.King Arthur: Come, Patsy.Black Knight: Oh, oh, I see! Running away, eh? You yellow bastards! Come back here and take what's coming to you! I'll bite your legs off!
Minstrel: Bravely bold Sir Robin rode forth from Camelot. He was not afraid to die, oh brave Sir Robin. He was not at all afraid to be killed in nasty ways, brave, brave, brave, brave Sir Robin. He was not in the least bit scared to be mashed into a pulp, or to have his eyes gouged out, and his elbows broken. To have his kneecaps split, and his body burned away, and his limbs all hacked and mangled, brave Sir Robin. His head smashed in and heart cut out, and his liver removed, and his bowels unplugged, and his nostrils raped and his bottom burned off and his penis...Sir Robin: That's, uh, that's enough music for now, lads... looks like there's dirty work afoot.
On second thought, let's not go to Camelot. It is a silly place.