The Apartment quotes

J.D. Sheldrake: Ya know, you see a girl a couple of times a week, just for laughs, and right away they think you're gonna divorce your wife. Now I ask you, is that fair?
C.C. Baxter: No, sir, it's very unfair... Especially to your wife.

Jeff D. Sheldrake, C.C. Baxter

Oh, I have a present for you. I didn't quite know what to get you. Besides, it's kind of awkward for me shopping, so here's a hundred dollars. You go and buy yourself something.

Jeff D. Sheldrake, C.C. Baxter

When you're in love with a married man, you shouldn't wear mascara.

Fran Kubelik, C.C. Baxter