Bonnie Kelly: I had an abortion. It just didn't take.Charlie Kelly: What does that mean?Bonnie Kelly: You survived it. You survived the abortion!
Read more Charlie Kelly QuotesFrom: It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
Charlie Kelly: Check it out... Who's to say we didn't put that very same poison in the drinking water?Mac: Everybody relax. He's lying. He doesn't have any poison.Charlie Kelly: No, I don't have any on me. But I do keep some in my fridge at home in the relish jar.Frank Reynolds: There's poison in that jar? I thought I was allergic to pickles.Frank Reynolds: What's in the jar with the skull and crossbones?Charlie Kelly: Well, that's mayonnaise. That's a decoy.Frank Reynolds: And the mayo?Charlie Kelly: That's shampoo.Frank Reynolds: You're telling me I've been putting shampoo on my sandwiches?Charlie Kelly: If you're using the mayonnaise, yeah... probably.
Charlie Kelly: These are two dead bodies.Dee Reynolds: They're dead. Two dead guys.Charlie Kelly: This is the real deal here.Dee Reynolds: [Examining African American specimen] I don't think I can eat this guy.Charlie Kelly: I don't think I can, right? Why is that?Dee Reynolds: I don't know.Charlie Kelly: It's not because he's black, though, right?Dee Reynolds: Of course not... I don't think so... No.Charlie Kelly: It's because he's dead, right?Dee Reynolds: It's because he's dead, that's why not.Charlie Kelly: Good, good, good.Charlie Kelly: I've got a question for you: is it racist if we don't eat this guy?Dee Reynolds: Well, shit, Charlie. Now it is.Charlie Kelly: I'm sorry, Dee.Charlie Kelly: The white guy over here looks better to me for some reason.Dee Reynolds: So much better, doesn't he? What is that?Charlie Kelly: You know what it is? Generally, I don't eat dark meat.Dee Reynolds: I prefer the white meat. I always have.Charlie Kelly: It's not that guy. It's this guy.Dee Reynolds: The problem is: I'm gonna have a really hard time if we're both cannibals *and* we're racists.Dee Reynolds: We're not, Dee. Cannibalism? Racism? Dee, that's not for us. You know? Those are the decisions that are best left to the suits in Washington. Okay? We're just here to eat some dude.Dee Reynolds: You lost me with Washington, but the rest I agree with. So let's eat a peace of this guy.Charlie Kelly: I can't do it.Dee Reynolds: No. Me neither.Charlie Kelly: The goods news is, I guess this means we're not racist.
Let's talk stigmatas.