You're moving to Chicago? Is that even a real place? It's a style of pizza. Ted, you can't live in a pizza.
Read more Barney Stinson QuotesFrom: How I Met Your Mother
Ted Mosby: Barney, what are you doing? You can't take this apartment from Marshall and Lily.Barney Stinson: You think I have no morals whatsoever? I'm only pretending to live here so I can take this woman here, nail her and never have to see her again. I'm not a monster.
Robin Scherbatsky: You stole the blue French horn for me.Ted: I would have stolen you a whole orchestra.
Barney Stinson: Stop pining over Marshall and Lily! Have some self respect. Now put this fiver in your mouth so that stripper with the lazy eye can vacuum it up with...Ted Mosby: Barney! I'm allowed to miss them alright? They're my two best friends.Barney Stinson: I'm your two best friends!