You and Maze are like snow pants and elephants. You don't mix.
Read more Lucifer Morningstar QuotesFrom: Lucifer
Jay Lopez: I'll get my act together, I promise.Lucifer Morningstar: No need to promise, Jay Lopez. Because I'll be watching you, and if you ever disappoint her again... I'll come for you.
Lucifer Morningstar: This is all your fault. You and your epiphanies. Turns out self-help is actually self-harm.Linda Martin: Hey, Lucifer, it's okay to be afraid. That means we're making progress.Lucifer Morningstar: Oh, we're making progress in precisely the wrong direction!Linda Martin: Oh, Lucifer! What's happening to you?Lucifer Morningstar: Exactly what I'd like to find out and quickly because I can't walk around like O.J. bloody Simpson forever!
Marcus Pierce: You must be Lucifer.Lucifer Morningstar: Morningstar, pleasure.Marcus Pierce: There was an investigation last year. We interviewed, what was it, 92 of your sexual partners? I think I'll refrain from physical contact if you don't mind.Marcus Pierce: You don't seem reckless. Narcissistic, hedonistic. That I see.Lucifer Morningstar: Well, thank you very much.Marcus Pierce: Not a compliment. Your file's as long as my johnson.Lucifer Morningstar: Quick read then?Marcus Pierce: Hardly.Lucifer Morningstar: Well, I for one don't need a file to ascertain you haven't even had a snog in ages, have you?Marcus Pierce: Accurate.