Vern: There's one thing I didn't understand. Did Lardass have to pay to get in the contest?Gordie: No, Vern. They just let him in.
Walking talking Jesus!
Vern: What am I supposed to do, think of everything? I brought the comb!Teddy: Oh, great! You brought the comb! What did you bring a comb for? You don't even have any hair!
Gordie: But you didn't miss him. Chris Chambers never misses, does he?Chris: Not even when the ladies leave the seat down.