Jeff Greene: What's with the hat?Larry: What? I'm married. I can wear whatever I want.
Read more Jeff Greene QuotesFrom: Curb Your Enthusiasm
See this thing? It's a mezuzah. Got that? And I need you to put it over the door here. This is like a Jewish thing - you know, we put it over the door so every anti-Semite in the neighborhood will know that we live here, in case they want to burn down the house.
Larry David: Thanks so much for stopping. Man oh man, I've been so lost, I mean I've been driving around for a half hour here, I'm just trying to get back to, um, to the freeway, to L.A...Brian: You don't recognize me, do you?Larry David: No...Brian: From the driving range, the other day? You're the, uh, you're the guy from the driving range. I was right behind you on the range...Larry David: Oh, right! Right! Wow!Brian: ...right, and you wouldn't help me out with the ball? The range ball, it fell and you wouldn't help me out with the ball...Larry David: The ball? Oh, no no no... you know what? My back was killing me that day, I couldn't bend down.Brian: Oh, your back was... I didn't pick up on that because you were hitting the ball so well, you were swinging great...Larry David: No, that's twisting. I could twist, I couldn't bend.Brian: Ohh, ah, OK, right... difference, yeah. Two different things.Larry David: It's a big difference, really. Oh my God, you must have thought I was such an asshole.Brian: Well I... you know, I didn't know why you wouldn't help me with the ball.Larry David: Oh god, what kind of prick doesn't pick up somebody's ball.Brian: I thought you could help out a little bit, but... I understand.Larry David: You know what, I would have picked up the ball in a second if I could bend down.Brian: It's your back, it was your back, right.Larry David: Completely. I'm sorry. I apologize.Brian: Sure. No, I understand, I understand. It's OK, it's alright.Larry David: Wait a second... are you going to Gil's party?Brian: Yeah that's why I'm... you know Gil? Oh, from the club, you must know Gil? I'm old friends with Gil, yeah, we... buddies for a long time.Larry David: So, uh, can I follow you over there?Brian: Should you be going to the party with your back? I mean, can you bend over, can you bend with your back?Larry David: Yeah...Brian: Well then maybe you should just bend over and kiss my ass, and maybe next time you'll remember to uh, pick up the fucking golf ball.
Larry David: I knew that big penis was nothing but trouble.Fire Chief: I'm sorry, what?Larry David: I knew that big penis was nothing but trouble.Fire Chief: Okay, I guess I heard what you said - I just don't know what you're talking about.