Victoria: I'm going to meet Ted for our 2 month-iversary.Robin Scherbatsky: Oh great, that answers all of the questions I didn't ask.
Read more Robin Scherbatsky QuotesFrom: How I Met Your Mother
Yeah, yeah, yeah. "Barney, what are you doing here? I can't believe it's really you. Come in. Have a seat. You want some tea? I know the apartment's small, I don't need much space. Let me show you some of my paintings, I think it's some of my best work ever..." Just stop it! Lily, you have to come home. You and Marshall belong together. The two of you have something that most people search their whole lives for, and never find. I know you love him, and if you knew what he was going through right now, you wouldn't be here for one more second. I bought you a ticket home. Marshall is one of the best people I know, and it won't be long until someone else realizes that, and you'll lose him forever. I can't stand the thought of that happening. And I cannot keep stealing chicks from him forever. Never ever tell anyone I was here, I will deny it to the nail, this trip never happened.
Ted Mosby: Barney, you've really grown up, you know that?Barney Stinson: Thanks, now lets watch our two best friends have sex on tape!
Penelope: Okay, crouch down and bend over a little bit.Barney: Wow, it took 5 shots of tequila to get you in that position.Penelope: I will throw you off this roof.Barney: So much of your mom in you.